We’ve reached the end of this miniseries that has probably done more for me than anything because as I put it in writing, it serves as another reminder of all the things that I should be truly thankful.
As I think of what should be my last unconventional blessing should be, it becomes a tiny bit emotional.
Unconventional Blessing #4: Being a mom to a extra special little girl
This one was hard to write because although Giselle is an absolute blessing and such a sweet gift, her disability isn’t. How can I say that a disability is a blessing? I can’t.
I can’t say it because it’s not a blessing to watch your child struggle at therapy.
It’s not a blessing to have to be in therapy to begin with.
It’s not a blessing to see your child having a difficult time in social settings.
It’s not a blessing to see your child fade further and further back as all the kids her age and younger surpass her.
It’s not a blessing to run around like a crazy person, bouncing from appointment to appointment knowing your daughter is completely over it, but scheduling appointments to make everyone happy just doesn’t exist.
In this case, the blessing is not in what something is or isn’t, rather it’s in what it produces in one’s life.
I became a different person. I often look at old pictures and hardly recognize the girl in them. There are moments that happen in which we know immediately that from then on out things will never be the same and you’ll never be same.
This has been one of those moments.
I could wish that I wasn’t part of this “club” and that my life would go back to how things were before, back when things were much easier. But it was in the darkest of moments that I was formally introduced to myself and the person I would be, because there was no turning back. The person I was is long gone, never to come back again.
Through tears and exhaustion I have become the work in progress that I am now. I am stronger and tougher because of her. I have learned so much about medical lingo, processes, but most importantly I’ve learned a lot about life and the things that matters most – the simple things. Giselle makes me brave.
I love her with every fiber of my being, and my mission is to change the world for her; to give her an opportunity to be everything she wants to be and I will either find a way or make one.
I am blessed because when my life got harder, my God became greater.
She introduced me to a world that I was unaware of – a world full of other tiny little super heroes who are fighting bigger battles than most adults, but they rise up and fight on, along with their families.
I urge you to look at your life in a new perspective and be intentional about thankfulness because it’s always easier to be bitter than to be better. Thankfulness is not season; rather it is a way of life. May you begin to place a semicolon where it feels like a big, fat period has been placed in your life. May you rise above adversity or any challenge in your life with passion and victory! I am abundantly thankful for all the blessings I have including the unconventional ones and the ones still in progress.
Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls:
Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.
The Lord God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds’ feet, and he will make me to walk upon mine high places. To the chief singer on my stringed instruments.