Feels like yesterday I was posting about welcoming 2016. This year wraps up a year filled with amazing milestones and accomplishments, and ushers in a brand-spanking new season that has me feeling an uneven mix of excitement and anxiety. However, I’ve never been more excited to see a year be done and over with – but it also begs the question: “What is the end result for me?”
I want what most people want – happiness, health, financial security, etc. Yet, in that pursuit, it always feels as if I’m continually saying “just wait until this season is over” or “once we are done with ______, then things will get easier.” This constant idea that if I can just GET THROUGH, then I’ll be where I want to be. But the truth is, where I want to be isn’t necessarily where I need to be.
Where do I need to be right now? I need to be HERE– in the trenches, doing the hard things. I know that it sounds pretty pessimistic, but it’s a foundational element to understand for us. It’s through the hard things, the road less often traveled that things our discovered that would not have been otherwise. This year I graduated college, which was a huge goal of mine, yet the work, the sacrifices are simply too much to describe here! Giselle has improved leaps and bounds in her ability to move and comprehend, yet very few can understand the long hours of commuting and therapy or all the work so many have done with her to bring her to this point.
We wouldn’t be here as a family if we skipped the hard things and expected to simply move through life inside a comfortable bubble.
So this new year, I have no resolutions besides resting in God’s plan for us. REST is a foreign word for me as I’m a do-er and a mover. But when I mean rest, I don’t mean just letting all my responsibilities go (which would be nice for a minute, right?). What I mean is to let me heart rest from the anxiety and burden I put it through. I need to rest in the one that I trust, which is God – who has my family in His hands and is sorting everything out for His good.
We weren’t made for comfortable and we certainly made to be afraid. We were made for such a time as this.
So yes, things will most likely continue to be messy, uncomfortable and most likely exhausting in 2017. It’s safe to say that I’ll continue to email away to ensure everyone is doing their job right and that Giselle gets everything she needs, while going back and forth picking up Vienna from school and helping her with her homework. But one thing is for sure – this hot mess we call OUR LIFE has produced the most incredible bond and love that a perfect life would have never given to us.
So cheers to messy, unpredictability and low expectations! Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful, so we will enter this upcoming year with our combat boots strapped ready for whatever comes our way and hearts full of gratitude towards all those who have blessed us this year! Let’s do this!!!!